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Never say never. [28 Apr 2008|12:00am] [ the little foxy isgo and download | calm ] Wow. I never deleted this old journal. It's hilarious to look through some of the things I posted back in the day. A time capsule of sorts. I'm not sure why I'm even posting here. Maybe just for old time's sake. Hm. both our cars collide

Final entry [16 Dec 2005|06:03pm] Due to the extreme lackage of comments, posts, and interest from both me and the LJ community, I am leaving LJ. You see, I have found a new love, and his name is Xanga. A land where I can expect at least one comment on every entry I make. And that, my friends, is amazing. If you want to keep up with me, I suggest you scurry on over there. Adieu! 2 will meet again when both our cars collide

Random ponderings of the cliche kind... [08 Dec 2005|02:09pm] What if there isn't a God? 4 will meet again when both our cars collide

Random thought yo! Silver would appreciate this... [05 Dec 2005|10:38pm] [ the little foxy isgo and download | thoughtful ] [ the little foxy isgo and download | Seasons of Love--Rent ] Ever think that maybe the reason we don't feel like we have a direction in life is because we're too scared to take the direction our heart desires? Is it maybe because we don't feel like we're good enough, strong enough, talented enough, etc etc to go out and do the things we really want to do? And instead of doing those things we want, we end up with these things that are just okay... just the second or third option. Maybe for some people it's the millionth option. Whatever it is, it's not what we really want to be doing. How can you even pretend to be happy doing something that only mildly amuses you? How could you even watch someone doing what you wanted to be doing and not feel so... jealous? frustrated? How could anyone be okay with just okay? Maybe that feeling of having no direction is really the emptiness we feel when we convince ourselves we're inadequate and incapable of achieving the things that live only in our hearts and dreams. 2 will meet again when both our cars collide

"How do you know 'holla' ain't short for 'hallelujah?'"--Lemon, Def Poetry Jam [05 Dec 2005|01:14am] [ the little foxy isgo and download | chewing skin off her lips ] [ the little foxy isgo and download | Small Town--Thousand Foot Krutch ] I LOVE Def Poetry Jam. Mostly 'cause I could never ever do it. Tehe! GO DUDEFACE! Yeah, so anyway, not much happening here. I hate chapped lips. Finals are this week, yaaaaay. Finally, NO MORE FRENCH. I think I'll miss it, at least a little... mostly because of the friends I just started making in that class. My hot Harry Potter is in that class too. Le sigh. My drawing final is going to be a BITCH, though... Vaden put a bunch of random crap in a pile in the middle of the room, and then told us to pick a spot and draw it. And then she'll choose a small portion for us to shade. I think I'm gonna bomb it, which would suck, but sometimes these things happen. I usually end up doing ten times better than I thought I would on anything I do in that class anyway. Speaking of that... the art show was last week or so... and guess who got an honorable mention? THAT'S RIGHT, yours truly, got an honorable mention on her Mr. Platyfantastico the III. My mom told me she wants it for her birthday. I have no problem handing it over, esspecially considering the inspiration for the piece. Maybe I'll get it framed for her... Random thought for the night: A woman came through my line today. She's come by before... she has the same name as me, and she had given me her buisness card. But that's irrelevant. Anyway, we were talking about school and things and I mentioned I was an art major. I mentioned how I didn't care whether there was a job opprotunity or not, I'd be doing something I loved. And she said, "Good. Follow your heart and the rest will fall into place." Maybe it was the optomistic kid in me, or maybe it was the brisk air gushing in from the doors making me lightheaded... but I smiled at that. I don't care if it's a tired, old cliche... it's nice to know I'm not the only one who believes that. I mentioned it to Shannan, and she said that things don't always work out that way. I can attest to that; however, I still think that if you're truly following your heart in a situation, mine being a career goal, then you'll do whatever it takes to make it happen. Things don't just fall into place, you drop them into place. Does that make sense or am I rambling again? God, it seems like the more online blogs I create, the less people care... heh... must insert random quote! "Hm, no time to poop... I'll just do it on my way down the stairs, you're going to vacuum anyway, right?" --American Dad both our cars collide

[02 Dec 2005|11:54pm] I'm so bored. 1 will meet again when both our cars collide

Ahhhhhh.... [28 Nov 2005|05:53pm] [ the little foxy isgo and download | I'm Not That Girl--Wicked ] Ahhh... I just want to thank Sarah and Silver for introducing me to Wicked. I wanna go see it SO BADLY now. Thanks. Thanks a lot guys. Now I have a new addiction. Like I need it, haha... ( I'm Not That Girl ) ( Popular ) 1 will meet again when both our cars collide

Interesting... [28 Nov 2005|11:35am] [ the little foxy isgo and download | content ] Balance ~ 55% Water ~ 55% Wind ~ 44% Earth ~ 55% Fire ~ And I know and I believe There's a way out to the sea of happiness It seems your personality is in perfect harmony; your impulses are tempered with thoughtfulness, and your emotions are balanced with a healthy amount of reason. In order to maintain that harmony, try wearing a Jade, a Chrysoprase or an Agate; all three enhance balance and stability, as does the Snowflake Obsidian that will help remain balanced during times of change. In detail: You are more balanced than most people. Your Ground Chakra, (associated with the element of fire and representing our basic desires and driving force), your Creative Chakra, (associated with the element of </b>earth</b> and representing our need to preserve and grow), your Heart Chakra, (associated with the element of water and representing our sense of love and compassion), and your Throat Chakra, (associated with the element of wind and represents our desire to learn and communicate), appear to be on an equal footing with each others. These are the results you will get if you score highly on... None of the four elements: Balance Wind: Gust Fire: Blaze Water: River Earth: Valley Wind & Fire: Thunder Wind & Water: Clouds Wind & Earth: Canyon Fire & Earth: Lava Fire & Water: Tornado Water & Earth: Trees Wind, Fire & Earth: Storm Wind, Fire & Water: Stars Wind, Water & Earth: Forest Fire, Water & Earth: Avalanche All four elements: Harmony My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 45% on water You scored higher than 8% on wind You scored higher than 14% on earth You scored higher than 29% on fire Link: The Elemental Balance Test written by Nitsuki on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test +*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+ I probably could've guessed that was going to be the result. It's funny though... even if I'm balanced, harmonious, what have you... I still feel stagnant and unsatisfied. WTF? Oh, please people, don't forget about the ornament thingy. My tree is bare. It needs some ornament lovin' from my friends. PweeeeaaaassseeeE???? 1 will meet again when both our cars collide

A christmas request! [24 Nov 2005|11:15pm] [ the little foxy isgo and download | crazy ] [ the little foxy isgo and download | Truth--Seether ] Alright people ... I hope you are feeling creative. Now that Thanksgiving is over, it's time to stick up the Christmas tree. However, I don't have many decorations. So instead of buying them, I thought it would be cool if each of my friends made me an ornarment (sp?!) for my tree. Hell, anyone READING this can make me an ornarment. Go crazy, kids, I want some cool random stuff to stick on my tree. But it needs to have your name on it somewhere. Anyway, I'll stick hooks on 'em, so don't worry your pretty little heads about that... please do this! It would make my freaking year if all my friends did this. Thanks guys. You're the best. All of you. 2 will meet again when both our cars collide

[23 Nov 2005|11:16am] Ugh, I just had my eyes raped for thirty minutes. Heather, your download is done. 1 will meet again when both our cars collide

[23 Nov 2005|12:45am] [ the little foxy isgo and download | okay ] [ the little foxy isgo and download | Just the Girl--The Click Five ] Oh man. It smells like shit in this apartment. Shannan and I are cleaning and WHOA. It is smelly. I just took down this trash bag that I swear weighed ninety pounds... yeah, we cleaned out the fridge. We realized that we don't actually have food. We just have condiments and juice. No booze. There should be booze. Then it'd be a true college student's fridge. God that's a strange word. Fridge. There is talk of purchasing booze on Thursday... sounds like a plan to me! Anyway, I'm ready for Thanksgiving. Not really, though, because I have to work on that day anyway. I know, that's stupid. WM should be fucking closed on Thanksgiving. So that I can have a day off once in awhile. Geez. Damn WM. I feel bad because Shannan's over there doing the dishes and I'm sitting here... on my duff... typing in my LJ. I'm gonna go hang clothes or something, and be productive. 2 will meet again when both our cars collide

[21 Nov 2005|07:50pm] [ the little foxy isgo and download | amused ] HAHA read this in a post for a download of Sensitive Pornograph.... AKofC at 2005-11-17 15:27 GMT: Real men download porn blindly. And if it turns out to be gay porn, then we jack it off to that. Because real men don't make mistakes. both our cars collide

[19 Nov 2005|11:11pm] [ the little foxy isgo and download | chipper ] [ the little foxy isgo and download | Bitches Ain't Shit--Ben Folds ] Wow... work tonight was fun! But work during the day... sucked. But WalMart always sucks. I actually had a lot of fun at My Town... still kinda feelin' around in the dark though. I work with a bunch of guys, and I think they all see me as a fragile little girl... I'm waiting for my chance to pop that stereotype. But for now... bleh. Anyway, I have to be at WalMart tomorrow at eleven... egads... so I'm off to sleep. Tata! both our cars collide

Yay for good things! [12 Nov 2005|11:41am] [ the little foxy isgo and download | contemplative ] Ugh wow I apologize for that last entry. Talk about crap. I guess it was postmordom. Well, things are looking up for me. I have a weekend job shooting video for Harding basketball games/Midnight Oil's live music night or whatever thingy. Yay. Six an hour, woot. Melody is gonna hate me at WM though... she's the one who makes the schedules, and I'm pretty sure she's gonna shit her pants when she finds out I can't work the weekends... or that I at LEAST need to move my schedule earlier in the day. Oh saddness consumes. Hopefully this job at the tv station will give me some more hours than what's expected right now... 18-20 per week... ugh. At that payrate it's not quite enough to cover the bills. Sadly. I'm thinking about just "no-call-no-show"in' it today at WM and quitting. Yes, I realize that's a shitty way to quit. Usually I give a two weeks notice. But... I hate WM and everything associated with it, soooo... yeah. I'm gonna go read now. 1 will meet again when both our cars collide

And this is just bullshit. [11 Nov 2005|12:11pm] [ the little foxy isgo and download | cranky, but mostly just pissed ] [ the little foxy isgo and download | Starfuckers--NIN ] So... I had some interviewy-thing last night righ? Still not sure what it's about. But anyway, afterwards I go to WM to pick up a cookie sheet to make some yummie-ummie Otis Spunkmeyer cookies. No, that's not relevant to the story. So anyway I see my good friend Kellie there. I work with Kellie, she's a pretty cool person. She knows about the KS situation. Well, we were talking and somehow it got around to what happened Wednesday night... apparently she was pumping him for information on the whole girlfriend bit and he mentioned something about Micah liking him last semester and he was pretty sure I liked him now... and Kellie affirmed his fears. Thanks Kellie. Not that I didn't want him to know... hell, I was almost positive he already knew. And in fact, he did. I'm just pissed because NOW things have to be shitty, because I KNOW he's gonna be a douche about the whole situation and avoid me or what have you because GUYS ARE STUPID LIKE THAT. Yeah. So that's a load of crap. All I could do when I got home is bitch about it with Shannan, repeatedly screaming, "This is bullshit!" Of course, I didn't cry about it, because no guy is worth my time or tears. The only reason he won't date me, according to Kellie, is because he doesn't want to associate me with something he hates so very much. Arkansas and Walmart. And I understand that he hates it here. And I understand that point of view. But like Micah and I were talking about this morning, it can still be perceived as a very stuck up asshole point of view. And another thing that pisses me off... by me not telling him, HE gets all the glory. Like, he gets the satisfaction/ego boost of knowing that I liked him, but what do I get? The feelings of rejection because of where I live?! BULLSHIT. THIS IS BULLSHIT! That's okay though. I have other jobs lined up and ready for me. Like, practically jumping out to get me. There's one at TV3 that all I have to do is talk to my new awesome neighbor friend and bam. Travaille pour moi. I think I spelt that first word wrong. Oh well. And this internet thingy whatever I went and did last night... well if that pans out, let's just say that I'll no longer be in a financial bind, kay? Anyway, I found this interesting. ( Horoscopes of DOOM ) Okay, now that you've all had your daily dose of my horoscope... haha, yeah and the funny thing is I used to LAUGH at horoscopes. And now I'm thinkin'.... damn. That's hittin' pretty close to home. I guess, though, being vauge and talking about general things do make it fit any situation, ne? 2 will meet again when both our cars collide

Well this is crap. [09 Nov 2005|10:35pm] [ the little foxy isgo and download | pissed off ] So the shit's about to hit the fan at Walmart. You know, about Shannan and I living together. Apparently it's a bad thing... so one of us has to find another job before we get a d-day and/or fired. Or one of us has to move out. This is crap. 6 will meet again when both our cars collide

[09 Nov 2005|03:58pm] [ the little foxy isgo and download | sick ] [ the little foxy isgo and download | Overthinking--Relient K ] ( Quizzle my nizzle peace outizzle yo ) 2 will meet again when both our cars collide

[08 Nov 2005|11:28pm] Dammit. I already broke the challenge. 2 will meet again when both our cars collide

Yay quizzle! [07 Nov 2005|11:19pm] [ the little foxy isgo and download | okay ] [ the little foxy isgo and download | Teenage Wasteland ] Two Names You Go By 1. Melissa 2. Mel Two Parts of Your Heritage 1. Irish (duuuuh) 2. Indian Two Things That Scare You 1. tornadic thunderstorms 2. bees Two of Your Everyday Essentials 1. Music 2. ...ah...food? Two Things You Are Wearing Right Now 1. the jeans that are too big 2. the gauzy tan/blueflowery shirt Sarah gave me... I think it's the first time too... Two of Your Favorite Bands or Musical Artists (at the moment) 1. My Chemical Romance 2. Emery Two Things You Want in a Relationship (other than Real Love) 1. Humour 2. Truth Two Truths 1. No matter what... you can't make somebody love you. 2. It's better to lose a lover than love a loser. Two Physical Things that Appeal to You 1. Face (like high cheekbones... *swoon*) 2. broad shoulders... ? yeah, I dunno... Two of Your Favorite Hobbies 1. creating 2. making music Two Things You Want Really Badly 1. my car back! 2. to be in a relationship with someone who I actually have feelings for. Two Places You Want to go on Vacation 1. France 2. Japan Two Things You Want to Do Before You Die 1. do the family thing 2. have one helluva road trip with all my friends in tow Two Ways that you are stereotypically a Chick/Guy 1. I obsess over my apperance 2. I'm fickle (Yeah I said it. What?) Two Things You Normally Wouldn't Admit 1. I'm fickle. :-) 2. That I'm wrong sometimes. Haha... Two Things You Are Thinking About Now 1. That guy off "The Girl Next Door" has a NICE ass. 2. Dammit... Kyle has a nice ass too. Two Stores You Shop At 1. Goodwill 2. Hottopic Two people I would like to see take this quiz 1. marlacarie 2. zemur Two people I haven't talked to in a while 1. Kyle 2. Sarah +*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+ So, tonight I take a challenge. As of twelve o'clock midnight tonight, I will not talk about the guy I have a crush on for exactly one week. I can talk TO him, flirt with him, but when it comes to talking ABOUT him... my lips are sealed. Expect some pretty sparse entires for the next seven days. This challenge is null and void as of November 13 at 12am, CST. both our cars collide

YAYAYAYY!!!! [05 Nov 2005|11:20am] OHEMMGEE!!!! So I emailed Grant yesterday, 'cause he never emailed me back over the summer. Well I get home last night from work and LO AND BEHOLD! IT'S GRANT! He emailed me back!!! YAAAAY!! I was so happy. He called me his "female heartless bastard alterego!" *swoon* Yeah, I know there's no chance with him, and I don't have any feelings for him that way anyway... but it's so NICE to hear from a good friend every once in a while. MY CREATIVE SIDE RETURNETH! both our cars collide

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